I get many a message from brides to be, and the majority of them seem to have the same theme – “where can I get a strapless bra/sexy underwear/a backless bra in x size.”

It might be an unconventional thing to say, but wedding days are the one day that you want practical over sexy. You don’t want to to be rocking some sexy lacy babydoll that your spouse will no doubt be too tired and drunk to appreciate – if they can even get you out of your dress! You want to be fretting over where you put your bouquet, not whether or not your boobs are going to pop out at any given moment. And your dream dress may not be the most practical one for you – your body will dictate what works best and feels amazing.

If you have a big chest and you dream of strapless dresses then you need to find one that works without the weight of your boobs collapsing it. There might not be strapless bras available in your size, they might not be any good and you want to feel comfy and presumably stay dressed all day long! The amount of panicked brides who contact me asking me for impossible bras – backless stapless 40JJ bras just do not exist or work! But there are amazing dresses that will hold you aloft and those are what you should be seeking. But also, try on those styles that you never thought you would suit or like.

Prior to hitting the shops, make sure you do your research. Not all shops carry samples in all sizes – some start or stop at size 16, some may need to order a few samples in for you. You should also check their social media accounts out and read a few reviews. You don’t want to go to a shop that turns it’s nose up at your body type – you need to feel happy and you need to trust them. It sounds like a lot of work, but one bad dress experience can make you feel anxious about everything else, so take some time to find out what you need to know.

As I have touched on, the right underwear is important. Do not see your wedding day as the day to dress in the sexiest undies ever. You’ll need to wear them for at least 12 hours, you’ll need to feel comfortable and supported – and is it really worth getting thrush from a pair of lacy knickers that your drunk groom will be too far gone to appreciate anyway?! And so it’s best to go to your first dress fitting with a few bra options to go with a few different dresses, and to your subsequent fittings in the underwear that you intend to wear under the dress on the day. You need to know how everything is going to fit and look and work on the big day – plus, the bridal shop can sometimes offer advice or (in the case of my sister’s wedding) stitch bras into dresses! And yes, you wedding lingerie may end up being sexy and supportive, but you really need it to work for you on the day before it works it’s magic on your spouse. If you are really set on making your wedding night special then there’s always time to change before the consummation!

And onto the dress! Much like with the wands in Harry Potter, the dress chooses the bride! As I have touched on already – your dream dress may not the the best dress for your body shape and size, it might not look like you were hoping and so you need to be open minded during your search. You also need to be aware that sleeves can sometimes be added and removed, boleros and jackets and dress coats can be layered on top, and you do have to be realistic about your dress. There is something out there that will look amazing on you as you glide down the aisle, and it may be a surprise!

The same has to be said about your bridesmaids – be kind to them! Be aware that not everyone can wear strapless dresses or is happy to show off their arms. Not every colour suits everyone and we aren’t all able to walk in super high heels. It is of course your day, but it is a day of compromises in some ways!

Do you have any dos and don’ts when it comes to wedding dress shopping?


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