I know that I am very much guilty of making a snap judgement about people. That tramp begging for money? He’ll just spend it on booze. That pregnant 14 year old? Biiiig mistake. That young woman with a husband 3 times her age? Gold digger. Me? Judgemental stereotyper!!! And I shouldn’t be what with the way I am often perceived!
I myself am a waitress. I often get people asking me what I’m studying at Uni or if I am just working part time, maybe assuming I’m a Mum or something.
I am *just* a waitress, and you know what, I do ok. I love talking to people so that works out well, I prefer to be on my feet as I would be a whole lot bigger if I weren’t and I want to start my own business some day – running a healthy fast food take away place – of all things! I did well as school, very well at college and did go to Uni, but ended up dropping out as it was not for me. So I think that me being a waitress is a smart move, rather than me being an uninspired teacher who possibly despises her career. I’d love to see those snooty business men who treat me like an idiot last half a shift in my clumpy leg toning MBK trainers. Sure you don’t need a degree in maths to do my job, but you need a whole heap of other things. Not every waitress is dumb, not every waitress is smart, don’t judge a person on their profession.
I am also pretty fat. There is no other word for it. Well, I guess ‘chubby’ ‘obese’ and a few others. A nice little old lady said to me the other day ‘You’re so pretty. And such a sweet thoughtful girl. So when are you going to do something about your weight and stop wasting that pretty face’ – wow, I felt like I had been kissed and slapped. I know I need to lose weight but that was brazen… That same day I received this email:
And I was facking confused! I mean on one hand I had a women making comments about me basically ruining myself because I was a bit too wobbly and on the other I was being told that me my flub and I had become a finalist in a modelling contest – way to confuse a girl! It had my emotions all over the place and I had a bit of a teary breakdown the other night. People seem to think that a fat person it just a cocoon and will not be a beautiful butterfly until they are slimmer. They deem them to have no will power, be less attractive to others and to not care about themselves. I wouldn’t write this blog if I wasn’t a tiny bit happy with my looks at some point, I wouldn’t have had such an overwhelmingly awesome response and over 100 subscribers if people didn’t want to look at me (or at least I hope!) and will power? I would be in debt if I didn’t exercise it every so often!
Check out this post from fellow plus size blogger Naomi Griffiths – I love it!
Big boobs – I feel I covered that stereotype in this post. Big boobs do not make you a slag. Big boobs are not the best kind of boobs. Big boobs should not make people jealous. Grrrr. I also love this post by Butterfly Collection.
I have a looottttt of tattoos. A lot. 15 at the last count. They mean and don’t mean a variety of things and a lot of them a very visible. Tattooed people are often heralded as having less desirable personality traits and mannerisms dependent on where they decide to have them. Many people seem to associate tattoos with spur of the moment random impulse acts and prophesise that they will always lead to regret. Well I could say that about people who have children. People who get married. People who do all kinds of things. Yes tattoos cannot be removed unless you take a lot of time, spend a lot of money and go through a lot of pain and so are pretty much there for life – well that to me makes them a helluva good investment! So people don’t like them – luck they are on me then isn’t it! I can’t stand certain hair styles, certain fashion choices and so on, but I do not preach that to them (well, not always) or make judgements as to why they have done that. We all do things that we may live to regret or want to change or absolutely adore and you know what, who are we to make unwelcome judgements on how someone wants their body to look. I consider myself to be a pretty level headed ok kind of girl and I hope my tattoos aren’t something I have to overcome to prove myself.
My last stereotyping bugbear comes from…my boyfriend! A computer programmer by day and runner by early evening. He is not a geek (much :p ) and does not run purely for fun or charity or fitness but for a club and he does very well at it. He loves both of his jobs but they do not define him.
I wrote this post because I am fed up of people telling me that I am this, should do this, am that because of how I look, act, work and so on. Some things about myself I can help, some I can’t, none of them give people the right to assume.